Progress Update!

I was a little  lot disappointed when I stepped on the scale and measured this morning. I am still at the starting weight of day one and I've only lost a half inch from my waist from day 15. I was pretty upset. I wasn't in the mood to work out and I just wanted to quit. It didn't help that both my kids are sick today. Poor little dears.
 I texted a couple friends and family and got encouragement to keep going. I really am so grateful for loved ones who believe in me. Melissa, Andrea, Jessica, Emily and Sean seriously helped more than they know :) I did my work out for the day during nap time and I have to say I felt even better afterward. I was sore and still am sore but I am glad I didn't quit. When Sean got home he took my pictures and I compared them to Day 1. I can still see areas that I need improvement but seeing the difference made me so happy. Sean gave me lots of complements and that really made my night. Working out is a hard thing to keep up but with a good support system and after having done it for months I'm hoping I can keep this a life style. I more flexible ( I can actually bend over and touch the floor with straight legs! I have never been able to do that before), I am stronger and I have way more endurance! I can go running for 30 hour and not be tired. Brianna, the founder of the Bikini Body Mommy, is simply amazing for doing this workout program for free for moms and other women all over the word. So here is the daily pictures from days 25 to Today Day 30 :) 

another cardio day done. I made my own hiit routine while Sean watched in the background haha 

My arms are getting more toned! 

Rest day means Family Fort time :) the kids loved it. 

I did 100 walking lunges in 2:25 ! Half way through I was thinking "why have contractions not started!?" Then I remembered I'm not pregnant. Haha. Lunges were my friend back when I was trying to induce labor. Not so much when the results are so quickly achieved. But I did it! The boat poses and oblique crunches are being felt the day after. Ouch. 

I love her face. 

Here is my picture comparing the day 1 and day 30! 

I don't know if anyone other than Sean will notice the subtle changes. I have muscle definition in my arms, my face is skinnier, I can see my abs now, my back fat roles are smaller, my waist is smaller, and my butt is smaller. I'm not completely pleased but it's not too bad so far. 30 days down and 60 to go!!! 

Getting healthy in 2014

I started a work out challenge with one of my besties Melissa. Its a 90 day challenge built by a mom for mom's to lose the baby belly and get healthy. Here is the link to her site 

http://bikinibodymommy.com/category/90-day-challenge/

She is such an inspiration. If you haven't heard of her you should read her story. Basically she has done this challenge 2 times and this is her 3rd time doing it. This is the first time she has added videos to the work out. Each day she posts on her website, facebook group and youtube the work out for the day. I love how easy it is to schedule the workout into my day. Its always 20 min or less (unless you chose to do 45 min cardio instead of the 20 HIIT workout for cardio day). The workouts aren't easy. They definitely kick my butt. Thats a good thing though. If it was easy then it wouldn't do anything for my body, but I can get through it. I feel stronger each day. I love how she is going through the work out right along side me. Its a good change up from the usual workout videos you see with a skinny minnie leading the workout asking why youre struggling and saying "if I can do it you can too!". haha right. She has 30 pounds to lose (her words not mine) too so its nice seeing someone that looks like me doing the workout. She gets tired and winded at the end of the workout too! And then she is right there the next day doing the work out. It makes me feel like I can do it too. Another great motivator for me is that Melissa is doing it with me. We text each other before and after our workouts and give support. Also one day that Melissa didn't want to do it I texted her and told her she had to do it and to push through. Then 2 days later she did the same for me. Ya we rock like that :) We have been eating healthier too! Like the Briana (work out trainer) says "you cant out train a bad diet".  I got discouraged the first week when I gained 2 pounds but then Briana said in her video that day that its to be expected with working out. Water weight, muscle, your body is changing. I think measured my belly and I had lost 2 inches! I would love if my body would just transform in a 2 week period but its just not how it happens. I need to have patience and keep pushing on. The results will come.

After I had Noah I tried to lose the extra weight I had gained. I tried for a couple days and then did one or more of the following each time I made a commitment to lose the weight. I either 1. got bored of working out and quit   2. Got busy and didn't make it a priority 3. Got discouraged that I didn't see results right away.  4 hated the workout I was doing and just quit. 5. Decided not doing anything was easy.

Each time I basically decided it wasn't important enough to push through to the end. I had lost 20lbs of the 30 I had gained quit easily just from giving birth and then breastfeeding. The last 10 pounds I didn't lose. I then got pregnant with miss Rebekah a year after having Noah. That's when I lost those 10pounds I had gained while pregnant with Noah. I was throwing up so much I lost 10 pounds with in the first month of being pregnant. Then of course as pregnancy goes I gained that 10 back plus. At the end of my pregnancy with Rebekah I was 40 pounds heavier than my prebabies weight. Again just having a baby and breastfeeding (had to stop BF when Rebekah was 4 mo) I lost 20pounds again like nothing. Now I am 7 months postpartum and still 20 pounds heavier than I was before I got pregnant the first time. I realize having a baby means your body changes. In some ways it will never be the same. I'm ok with that in some ways. I can't lie to you and say that I love it because it reminds me that I'm a mother, or that I have a true women's body now. I just don't feel that way. I have seen so many blog posts on facebook and all over the internet about mothers embracing their postpartum bodies and not wanting to get back into the shape they were before having babies. They are beautifully written and empowering. I agree with the message. Love yourself for who you are. This is the body that created life. I get it. I do. Yet, I still don't read those articles and think "ya I'm fine with my body. The extra fat, stretch marks on my sides, weak muscles. Its all because I had a baby and thats beautiful. " ya, not so much for me. I know plenty of women out there are happy with their bodies post baby even without fitting in their old jeans, or having a toned stomach. To them I say "way to go! Thats great that you can be so comfortable in your own skin and I'm sure you look great".  Even if I was happy with my body I think its still good to work out and be your best self. You can be happy and love your self and still have goals to be better. I feel like sometimes when I read those articles its saying that working out and losing the extra weight isn't a necessity and therefore you shouldn't worry about it. I agree its not a necessity. I have babies to take care of and other things to do. But taking time out of my day for me to work out is something that is good for me. I may not always want to do it but after I do I feel so good!

I would love to say that I am happy in my own skin and that I love my body how it is. I just don't. I know part of it is due to the postpartum depression I'm struggling with, another part is due to the fact that I don't think I ever really liked my body even when I was thinner. Yet another part is probably due to I'm a women and I'm crazy, as Sean so lovingly points out. Being skinner and having a toned body is not going to just fix my insecurities with my body. Its deeper than that.  However I still want to work out and lose this extra weight I have gained over the last two babies. I don't think I will get back down to the weight I was before Noah. I'm a different women now. I have hips and a chest I never had before being a baby maker. To me wanting to lose the weight and get more toned isn't just about looking good. I don't think I need to fit back into a mold of who I was almost 4 years ago. I do however want to be healthy. I want to be able to go for a run and not be exhausted after going half a mile and having to walk until I have the strength to run again. I want to be an example to my children that being healthy isn't about being skinny. (Even though I really do want to be skinny haha Can't lie). Its about eating right and taking care of your body.

Briana says to post your before pictures so you can be accountable and continue to work out and get to the end of the challenge. My ever so lovely friend Melissa did and gave me the motivation to do it too. I was going back and forth with doing it. Here they are.

And these last pictures are from the first day of the challenge. I was going to wear a t shirt but I really wanted to be able to see the change at the end so I took the plunge and wore my work out bra thing. 

Week 23, 24 and 25

Bump update again. Not much has changed lately. Belly hasn't grown much even though I'm sure Rebekah has grown loads. Her kicks are so strong now. I feel her all day and I love it. She is just reminding me she is there and that she loves me. Also she loves when I eat syrup or chocolate milk. She does flips right after. It's so funny. I can see my belly move now as well. It looks like an alien is trying to make it away out haha. Noah loves feeling my belly and he laughs when she kicks. He likes to sit on my belly like its a chair. He said "Bekah" last week and now it's one if his daily words. I haven't gained any weight since my last dr appointment. I think all the yoga and Zumba I've been doing helps with that. But I eat tons and keep this baby girl quite satisfied with a good mix of healthy and junky foods. I love you little Rebekah. Keep growing. I can't wait to meet you and have Noah and daddy see and hold you. You will love them. They are cool dudes.

Another tmi moment brought to you by pregnancy : I lost my mucus plug last night. I was a little concerned since I'm only 25 weeks. I lost my plug with Noah somewhere past 30 weeks. And usually it's a sign you're going to have he baby soon. I called the dr and talked to the dr on call since it was 7pm. He said not to be alarmed. It's not common but it's not bad as long as I'm not having contractions and I havent had my water break. He said unlike the water you can continue to lose your mucus plug because it grows back. So I'm fine. Just a little weird for it to start happening so soon.

My fingers are offically too swollen to wear my wedding ring. Sean almost ripped my
 finger off trying to get the ring off on Saturday morning. I'm wearing it on a chain around my neck
now. Its so pretty I want to still wear it everyday even if its not on my finger.

Stuff

Noah finally is all better. Actually he has been for a couple days but I forgot to mention that. Also I am all better as well. Sean luckily never caught the bug that was going around. Yay for blessings :) He was able to stay focused on school and taking care of his sickly family.

Things have been good with the Howell family. Sean is doing great in school and is really interested in his greek history class. He has an obsession with Alexander lately and loves to watch documentaries about him. He has healed up really well from his Hernia surgery. He has even started doing some core excersises and feels really good about them. He is being careful to not over do it too fast but is confidant that he can get right back to his old work out routine. This time just no holding his breath while doing a pull up. He is going to start going back to the gym every morning like he used to this week. Yay for him! He is a happy man when he is able to get his work out on. All that manly testosterone needs some where to go.

Noah is a little sponge of learning and we love it! He repeats words and remembers what they are connected to. He knows his  ears, eyes, mouth, nose, belly button. He also loves to say proudly "pee" when he sees someone going to the bathroom. He has been showing a lot of interest in the potty. We bought a potty seat and step stool this week but he has yet to use it. So far he has just played with the seat and carried around the apartment. Its good for him to get familar with it and make it his own. He did however pee on the toilet with out the seat on it two days ago. My baby is going into the potty training days! Its so crazy. We realize that he might lose interest but for now we are going with it. It would be pretty convienent to have him potty trained before or just after Rebekah is born. I would LOVE to not have to change double the diapers. We will just see what Noah decides to do. We don't want to push it.

So! The potty story: Sean's mom was watching Noah during the day at our apartment on Tuesday this week. I got home from work and Noah and I played while she let me know how their day went. She said that he pooped and right away grabbed a diaper and handed it to her saying "pee". He hasn't figured out poop yet. Thats a good sign of readiness for potty training that he knows when he goes. While he is peeing often times he will let us know as well as he is going in his diaper. He is a pretty smart kid! So after she left Noah and I played some more and then all of a sudden Noah grabbed his diaper at the crotch and said pee. I felt it and he had already gone but I figured might as well just start making the connection for him that pee goes in the potty. So I took off his pants and diaper and held him on the toilet. He laughed and sat there for a minute saying pee over and over. Then a little trickle of pee came out! I was so happy for him. It was probably just because I had been holding him there at the right moment but still pretty awesome that he knew pee goes in the toilet. I said "yay!" and "good job" He loved the excitment. He then grabbed a bunch of toilet paper and threw it in the toilet saying "paper". haha. I let him flush the toilet and put a new diaper on him. Right as I was doing that Daddy came home. I yelled at him from the room the good news. He straight away went to the kitchen and grabbed an M&M and gave it to Noah as a treat for his good job. Noah was so happy. That was the only time he has wanted to sit on the potty since but we will see how things go in the next couple weeks if he stays interested in potty.

Wednesday I went to a Zumba class with my good friend Melissa and her cousin. I usually am horrible with working out but that was actually really fun! Zumba is just a high pace dance/workout class. It has fun moves to hip hop music that get your cardio on big time. Melissa and I being pregnant had to modify some of the moves to accomidate our big bellys and tired bodies but it was still a good work out. The class was at Gold's Gym. Since I don't have a membership I had to pay $5 to go. Sean has a membership there And goes in the mornings. Melissa just got a membership and she gets to bring a friend for free but we decided to split the gym cost and each pay $7.50 and go every week. Then I can go after Noah goes to bed 2 days a week and that will give Sean time to study with no distractions.

I had a dr appointment on Thursday. I'm measuring on schedule. I've only gained 8 pounds but dr Hazelrigg isn't concerned cuz I didn't gain much with Noah either. All my vitamin levels are good and Rebekah has a nice strong heartbeat. I'm having pretty bad hemroids this time around which suck but I finally got a prescription to treat it. Yay ! Haha. Tmi but tis the nature of my blog.